Spam Spam Spammity Spam


BY Sam Davies


18 January 2017

Reading Time: 2 minutes

I have developed a sixth sense for detecting Spam. I am sure you all have too. It comes in many forms and is far more unpalatable to me than it’s canned cousin. Emails, Phone Calls, Linked In Messages and snail mail, it all smells the same. If you run a business in 2017 you will be receiving a good dose of it every day.

But seriously, who the hell does it work on!

I registered a new domain for a test server for DN last week. I didn’t block the registry details and over the last week I have been attacked with emails and phone calls. They usually call at around 4 pm and in generally poor English will start with:

“Hello you have business, we sell websites, you want a website right?”

Erm…well we build websites, so NO we do not want some piece of shite website you are trying to sell me on a cold call.

It is the same with SEO and Digital Marketing and a host of other services that can be outsourced. There must be armies of call centres targeting Australian business owners with poorly written scripts and emails. I can only assume it is a game of scale. Call 3000 maybe get lucky on one?

Are people really that naïve that they are willing to entertain the thought of giving business to someone who has

  • Poached their email / phone from a third party
  • Done ZERO research into their business
  • Has a terrible website / social presence themselves
  • Is generally not local

I spend a huge portion of my time thinking about and executing ways to market our services that are the exact opposite of all of these points. There is no chance of a meeting from a LinkedIn message beginning

Dear Sir / Madam, I believe we have great potential synergies between our organisations

You will be deleted. Everytime. I am not interested in your lack of imagination and cookie cutter approach to business.

My question is, in 2017, is this working on anyone? Do any of you still practice:

  • Cold Calling
  • Spam emailing

If so I would love to hear about your conversion rates and also your customer retention. I am going to assume both numbers are poor.

Please stop sending me SPAM.

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Sam Davies

Sam has been running a Digital Agency in some form or another for almost a decade. He loves the internet and the positive changes it has brought to the world but still loves time away from the glowing cubes. Surf, Fish, Drink, Cook, Laugh….Drink! You can follow him on Instagram @samdaviesdn and on Snapchat @digitalnoir